09 May 2006

Greatest Pickup Line Ever

The episode of HIMYM on last night revealed the age old secret of the greatest pickup line ever. The guy's lines are below with predicted responses. FYI, this line is best used in a bar full of your friends or at least people who like you ;) I am also providing a vid to help illustrate it's use.

Guy:
Excuse me, has anyone ever told you... OH MY GOD!
Girl: What?
Guy: (to waitress) Oh, Call an ambulance!
Girl: What's going on?
Guy: Oh, try not to speak. Here, sit down. Just don't talk, don't talk.
Waitress: Is she okay?
Guy: (to waitress) I'm serious, call 911.
Girl: What's wrong, what's the matter?
Guy: Shhh, just don't move, don't move. Just try... Here, have some water.
(to waitress) Water!
Here, drink this. Shhh, Shhh.

(Paramedics arrive)

Guy:
Oh, thank god you're here.
Girl: What is going on?
Guy: I think there might be some internal bleeding, probably some fractures. We gotta get her to the hospital.
Girl: What are you talking about?
Guy: You've had a terrible fall.
Girl: No, I haven't.
Guy: Really? Cause, I could swear you fell straight out of heaven, Angel. (blink, smirk)
(underbreath) Give him your number.
Guy: What?
Crowd: Give him your number.
Guy: What?
Crowd: Give him your number.
Guy: What?
Crowd: Give him your number.
Guy: (to crowd) Come on, your're embarrasing me.
Crowd: Give him your number.
Guy: What are you... Come on!
Crowd: Give him your number.
Guy: They're not going to stop... till you give me your number.
Crowd: Give him your number.
Girl: (smile) Alright.

2 comments:

Arnold said...

I tried that and it didn't work. Of course, it probably had to do with the fact I said to call 911 not because she fell from heaven but because it looked like she had necrotizing fascitis. That, and after waiting in awkward silence for fifteen minutes for the ambulance to arrive, the real paramedics didn't really go along with it when they realized there wasn't an emergency. After that the whole thing kind of flopped.

Andy said...

Arne's version is better. How could any girl resist a pickup line that involves "necrotizing fascitis".